Nerdy little things I learned on my 30-day no shopping challenge

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havelessI have so many nerdy little things about me. Like, I love to collect highlighters and post-it notes. My book collection is organized by color first and then by size. The only friends lists I have on Facebook are separated by academic and non-academic friends. ‘Cause, you know, the academics are the only ones who get my grad school jokes.

I have no problem telling people about these funny, little quirks. These nerdy little things go with the nerdy little persona I’ve created about myself for this blog. So I kinda keep the other stuff about me to myself that doesn’t seem to fit into what most people think of as a nerdy, bookish former English teacher.

Until today, when I plan to tell you all about my 30-Day no shopping challenge. Because I love shopping.

Oh man, do I love shopping.

I didn’t grow up a girly girl. I hated the color pink, didn’t do my hair ever, and made my mom cry when I refused to wear the frou-frou pastel Easter dress she bought me one year (true story). But now? I regularly indulge in all the feminine frills. If it’s shiny, I want it. I can’t get enough tulle, and my favorite color is glitter.

I make no qualms about it. I’m glad I finally was able to shrug off all the cultural messages and unflattering stereotypes of femininity and just embrace it. It’s been fun, but the problem is my paycheck has taken most of the brunt. Shine, tulle, and glitter don’t come cheap, and I’ve been on a steady diet of all things pink and girly for a couple years now.

Ater rushing out to buy a pair of long-coveted pair of Ray-Ban sunglasses with part of my tax refund, I knew I needed a change. I didn’t need the sunglasses and besides, the last time I bought expensive sunglasses I lost them in eight days (RIP metallic, studded, on-sale Diors. Sigh).

So April became my no shopping month. No new clothes. No new shoes. No new jewelry. No new handbags. No new frivolous material possessions period. So what happened on my 30-day quest of not buying anything? Some wistful thinking, a little bit of whining, and a whole lot of thinking. Here’s what I learned.

Owning stuff is hard work, ya’ll.

I just finished reading The Joy of Less, which partly prompted this whole shopping rehab in the first place. Author Francine Jay schooled me on all things minimalism. One of my favorite “oh shit, she’s right” moments came when she explained what a burden owning stuff is. While it’s fun to pick out all those bright shiny things, getting them home and taking care of them is real work.

You know, finding the space for yet another cute top, spending more money on another shoe rack to hold yet another pair of shoes, and taking things to the repair shop or the dry cleaner. Really, shopping adds up on more places than just my credit card bill. It takes its toll just about everywhere else. Even physically, as I’ve had an entire shelf of shoeboxes fall on my head while I was cleaning out my closet once. It was nice to get a break from the work that comes from owning new things.

Even when I’m not shopping, I’m really still shopping.

You see, cutting out shopping was only the first part of the challenge. Sure, I could avoid the mall pretty easily by just not driving there, but I soon realized that most of my non-shopping hobbies actually revolve around shopping. When I’m surfing on Pinterest or reading some of my favorite fashion blogs, my eyeballs immediately land on the new, pretty stuff I could buy or the lifestyle I could have.

It became frustrating when everything I usually do seemed to subconsciously feed into my consumption habit. Reading magazines with plethora of advertisements. Watching my favorite TV shows featuring beautiful people wearing the most adorable outfit ever (like Rachel freakin’ Bilson on Hart of Dixie). I couldn’t even check my mail without being bombarded by coupons and catalogs! Turned out, this challenge wasn’t just about not buying stuff, but changing my lifestyle too.

Can you be feminine without buying stuff?

Femininity, in part, has been defined by buying and having things. It’s defined by owning stuff like clothes, jewelry, and shoes. How we show the world that we’re feminine is through things like lacquered lips and swishy skirts. Is there another way? Can you still be a girly girl without having to buy stuff?

Culture has always linked traditional femininity with consumption, but I want to believe we can still be feminine without the frills, the ruffles and the (expensive) lingerie. I’ll admit I’ve bought into this material construct of femininity wholeheartedly the last few years. I find it fun, a creative outlet, but maybe femininity isn’t something you can buy and put in a shopping bag after all?

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Who was your first? And ahem, I’m talking writing influences, dirty minds.

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I’ve written about writing influences before, in particular my lesser known, more quirky ones. While I’m trying to build my side business (!), I was thinking about my motivation for getting into this whole writing thing in the first place.

The bane of my childhood existence

The bane of my childhood existence.

American Girl dolls

My mother, ever the optimistic woman she is, was feverishly excited when she finally gave birth to a girl. After dealing with my two rowdy older brothers, she had been dreaming of tea parties and makeup lessons long before she held me in her arms. Too bad I turned into Tom Sawyer-in-lady-form. I refused to wear dresses or play house in favor of climbing trees and kicking around a soccer ball. Buying expensive American Girl dolls and accessories was her futile way of trying to make me more feminine. She didn’t know it at the time, but she did do some good. Though I hated playing with them, those dolls helped spark my interest in writing. Back then, American Girl dolls came with blank notebooks to write stories about your doll, and I filled every single page with made-up adventures. When I wasn’t traipsing through the mud, of course.

I bet Scarlett Johansson really regrets this outfit.

I bet Scarlett Johansson really regrets this outfit.

CosmoGirl

Growing up, I was a voracious reader. I was totally that kid who took those summer reading contests seriously and actually competed to win them. They were my own personal nerd Olympics, ya’ll. When I grew up into your typical dorky teenager with glasses, braces, and frizz, I wasn’t surprised when I didn’t have friends to sit with during lunch one semester in high school. So I went to the library, a place that had long been my sanctuary, to read and sneakingly eat my lunch. And that’s where I first found CosmoGirl, the goody two shoes little sister of sassy, kinda slutty Cosmopolitan. I tore through that magazine every month and quickly found myself relating and idolizing Atoosa Rubenstein, the editor-in-chief. A former high school nerd turned youngest editor at Hearst ever, she proved that nice girls finished first. I lapped up her message of empowerment and confidence, promising myself that one day, I would follow in her footsteps and become a magazine editor in New York.

Miss you, girl.

Miss you, girl.

Charming, but Single

Before RL&A, I had several blogs. I started writing pre-teenage missives on Diaryland (which I was pleasantly surprised still exists! And it still looks the same as it did in 1998!). I then migrated to Livejournal before landing on WordPress where I am now. My Google Reader is still bursting with blogs I read for inspiration, but none had an impact like Charming, but Single, a dating blog written by an anonymous Southern twenty-something. It was the first blog I remember reading regularly and I, like so many others, was hooked on every word. Before Twitter, before Facebook, there was Charming to remind me that I wasn’t alone out there on the Internet. An unlucky-in-love girl who I could cry with, laugh with, and most of all, root for her happy ending. As readers, we never knew if Charming ended up with her prince. She abruptly stopped updating us way back in 2008, but we still wonder about her as evidenced by comments left as recently as last month on her last blog post. If anyone taught me about how to hook an audience with just your story, your personality, and more importantly, your honesty, it was her. Cheers, Charming.

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The month that ate all my words and the funny thing about passion

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tumblr_mfvs67nrh91qhswtfo1_500_largeYou know when you’re getting sick. A sniffle there, a small cough there, and before you know it, you’re sitting on the couch with a heating pad and some chicken noodle soup binge watching America’s Next Top Model (Or is that just me?). Our bodies have a way of letting us know when something is wrong. Mine does too.

It’s called not writing.

I haven’t written very much of anything this month. No blog posts. No journal entries. Nothing. And for a girl who always seems to have an abundance of words to write, it was odd and off-putting. I’ve been searching  for the reasons why because there has to be some reason, right?

I thought about previous times when I didn’t write. There was this time when I was dating this guy who was awful for me. I knew he was, but I didn’t want to admit it. I knew if I cracked open my journal and had to face the blank page, the truth I didn’t want to face would come out. I don’t know about you, but I have a hard time lying when I write. I can pop little white lies out of my mouth (Oh my God, I love your skirt! Where did you get it?), but writing is different. Maybe it’s a journalist thing. Writing is my truth telling serum.

And once, in graduate school, I stopped writing for months during a spring semester. I was overwhelmed by all the other writing I had to do, I really didn’t have time to write for just myself. When I look back on it, I wasn’t in a good place. Like most first year grad students, I was letting the stress get to me. I was spinning, flailing, and drowning. I was doing all I could just to stay afloat.

So, when the month of March goes by without me writing a single word, I search for answers. The guy is long gone, grad school has been done for quite some time, so what is it? Am I feeling okay? Stressed? Overwhelmed? What’s going on behind the surface?

Nothing. Nothing’s wrong.

Weird.

After a month of nitpicking and and trying to find things that were wrong with me, I came up with nothing. I’m okay. Even when I’m not writing, I’m okay.

Weirder.

I love to write. I’m so passionate about it, I thought I would always want to write. Like, all the time. Maybe not research papers, but blog posts and journal entries? Hell yeah. But, just like any emotion, passion ebbs and flows. Some days, it’s there burning hot and ready. Some days, it’s not. It’s hiding and doesn’t want to come out to play. And that’s okay.

Because even when you love something, you don’t always want to do that one thing all the time. And that doesn’t mean you’re burned out or stressed or weird. It means that you’re human. And things come and go, passion ebbs and flows as it pleases. It’s just one of those human-ly things I have to get used to. I’m not saying you shouldn’t follow your passion or whatever, but be okay when it stops for a break along the way. Nothing’s wrong with you. You’re just being human.

Ah, being a human is weird, isn’t it?

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The February Recap: brought to you by sketching some fashion and burning off your hair. Hopefully only one of those will happen to me.

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I know I say this every month, but I can’t believe February is over. What?! I’m doing another recap already?! Crazy!

I just squeaked in publishing three blog posts a month (+ a recap post), but it was difficult. There were a million different things going on this month, but I don’t want to use “busyness” as an excuse. ‘Cause it shouldn’t be. This is important to me. You, my readers, are important to me. Since quitting teaching, I promised myself to make more room in my life for what’s important to me.

Continuing my love of gifs, I posted links and photos of plenty of them in Beyonce is my patronus, and other hair-whipping, thigh-gyrating thoughts on doing what you love. Like many others, I was obsessed with Queen Bey’s performance at the Superbowl. She looked amazing, sounded great, and just looked like she was loving it up there. I was mesmerized by her confidence (and yes, great hair too), and had to write about how we all need to find something we love that much.

In a different sort of Valentine’s post, How to unbreak your heart after leaving academia detailed some of the strategies I used to heal after leaving academia last fall. It hasn’t been easy, but doing things that were out of my comfort zone and normal routine was really important. In the process of healing yourself? Take some time to grieve. It really is like a break-up. But make sure you’re proactive about moving on. Easier said than done, I know.

And in big/exciting/scary news, I came clean in I’m an academic, and I’m starting a business. God help us all. Putting my intentions out there in starting a side business was not easy, but I felt I needed to be honest about what I’m working on and why I haven’t returned to teaching for the second semester. For now, I’ve decided to focus on building a post-academic life. Crazy, right? Expect to read more about this decision soon.

Enough about me though! Here’s some stuff I’ve been reading out there on the Internets.

College Humor kills it in 8 New Punctuation Marks We Desperately Need. In the age of email and text, humankind needs something to make up for the lack of body language and tone of voice. I don’t know about you, but I would use ‘sarcastises’ like, 20 times a day.

This article, Why Do Women Hate Anne Hathaway (But Love Jennifer Lawrence)?, got me thinking after seeing a Twitter feed full of barbs at Hathaway on Oscar night. I don’t really get the Hathaway hate. She was Princess Mia Thermopolis, for crying out loud. And her response to Matt Lauer’s creepy up-skirting question? So eloquent. But she’s just not as “likeable” as Lawrence who takes shots, eats McDonalds, and trips up stairs. This article does a good job of explaining the rock and a hard place that exists for women in the public eye.

Did I tell you I’m taking my first Skillshare class?! If you haven’t heard of Skillshare, it’s a great online community where you can take classes from anyone in the world. Though I can’t draw, I’m taking a class in fashion illustration. Yes, really! I had to sign up after I saw it was going to be taught by Katie Rodgers, the talent behind Paper Fashion. Even if illustrating isn’t your thing, there’s bound to be a class (or several!) that you’re interested in.

Though you have probably seen this viral video before, it doesn’t make it any less awesome. Watch as this hair tutorial go horribly wrong. Poor thing. Don’t worry girl, we’ve all been there.

I’m an academic, and I’m starting a business. God help us all.

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The first career I ever wanted was a children’s book author. I declared my intentions in scrawly letters to my fifth-grade teacher. I wrote that I wanted to be “awesome” like R.L. Stine or Judy Blume, so I could make a lot of money and travel the world like Carmen Sandiego. I still have that letter sitting in a box at my parents’ house.

Soon, authoring books gave way to caring for animals. The typical phase of wanting to become a veterinarian hit me hard in middle school. After I accidentally stepped on my cat’s tail, I “nursed” him back to health by making a cast for him out of masking tape. He was not pleased.

I spent my high school years wanting to be a dermatologist. Why? I wanted to find the cure for my pimples. Yes, really. Wait, it get worse. And for some reason, I thought dermatology required the least amount of math out of all the medical disciplines. This dream did not make it past high school graduation.

When I made it to college, I felt so at home in the liberal arts academic environment. This. This is where I want to be. I graduated with one degree, went back for another, and never really left the academic environment. Though I’m going on my second semester of not teaching, I still circle the fringes of it, continuing to work on campus in a different capacity.

While I love what I do, I felt there was something more for me. I don’t want to become complacent and as someone used to a full schedule of classes and extracurriculars, I was itching for a challenge. And of course, I probably picked the biggest one there is.

I’m starting my own side business.

Not a traditional brick-and-mortar store, but something that combines online entrepreneurship and my interests and talents. I’m currently finessing a business and marketing plan, and working on building a website. I’ve been doing a lot of behind-the-scenes work on nights and weekends, and it’s about time I make it known to the world that I’m doing this.

Because dreams don’t become real without accountability, right?

So this is me becoming accountable. I’m telling people what I’m doing. I’m setting deadlines. I’m working my ass off to make this a reality. It’s so freeing/scary as hell to admit your dreams out loud. It’s like I’ve suddenly switched on the lights in my dark home office where I work for hours on my business by just the glow of my laptop screen, and not only that, I’m inviting the whole wide world over to my place to see my progress (or gulp, my failures).

Okay, deep breath. I’m plunging in. I’m really doing this.

The emotions I’m feeling remind me of when I first started teaching. I felt this weird mix of excitement and anxiety, a concoction that made me feel both perplexed and inspired by my own enthusiasm. It’s something new. It’s something I’m not ready for, but I’m going to try so. freakin’. hard. to make work. I’ve made crazy situations (Me? Teach college kids? What?!) work before. I can do anything after teaching college kids.

One final note– I ask you, dear readers, are you curious on hearing about my process of building my side biz? I would be more than happy to share my thoughts with you on going from academia to the business world. Let me know what specifically want me to write about, and I’ll try to touch on it. As always, continue the conversation with me on Facebook or Twitter.

In the meantime, cheers to new adventures!

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How to unbreak your heart after leaving academia

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justbecause

I have a love/hate relationship with academia. Or more like a love/obsess/cuddle/hate/cry/curse relationship with academia. It’s what I love, but I had a hard time not losing myself in it. When I stopped teaching last semester, it felt like a crushing break-up with someone I began dating my freshmen year of college. Sure, I did my fair share of wallowing and soul searching, but I wish there were other things I would have done than sit on the couch and think (and cry) about my post-academic life. Here there are.

Do something real.

Theoreticians, mathematicians, word magicians, we’re a pretty cerebral bunch. We spend a lot of time pondering the “what-if’s” and “how come’s” of life. We love to drive ourselves mad, no? We also spend a lot of time sitting, reading, and typing. Now’s the time to get your head out of your book and do something real. Something tangible. Something that requires action and you would be proud to have written on your tombstone. Now’s the time to start living your life instead of reading and living vicariously through the adventures of Peter Pan, Captain Ahab, and the ilk.

Do something challenging.

And no, I’m not talking about the New York Times crosswords puzzle. I’m talking out-of-your-comfort-zone-OMG-I-can’t-do-this challenging. For me, it’s always something physical. I like to bend and push my wiry frame into physical challenges that I’ve always thought I couldn’t do. Like run five miles in under an hour or lift the 15-pound weights instead of the 10s. In time, your sexiest body part won’t just be your brain and your post-thesis committee confidence will rise. Exercise your body as much as your mind, and you’ll be amazed at what you can do.

Do something freeing.

Those who toil in “the real world” often get a bad rap of becoming wage slaves in cubicle prisons. On the other hand, academia is viewed as the promised land of lax work hours and leisurely summer vacations. Still, many forget the ivory tower has its own set of rules and schedules. Without the obligations of teaching, I was able to go on a beach vacation in September, a time I would when normally I would be ensconced in the campus library. And believe me, the sands and ocean water were ever more lovely with less school children, tourists, and high heat.

Do something out of your control.

Oh boy, do academics love control. This is my thesis. This is my classroom. It’s hard to give it up when every day, every action, every word seemed to have this great significance hinged to it. Will my professor approve of this? Will that help my paper get accepted? Will this class get me into a doctoral program? Controlling your own academic destiny leaves little time for play, mistakes, and happenstance. Now, you should compromise and give in. Surrender to someone. Even if it just for one night of your life, or the rest of it. Throw away your plans. Shrug off the pressure. Let go of who you should be to become who you are.

It all comes down to one thing. Do something. Anything.

I’ll admit for the first few months I spent a lot of my time frozen in fear. I was in shock and adjusting to my new life sans papers; writing them, grading them, or otherwise. It was a lot to take in. Still, I wish I would have begun moving faster. And I don’t mean logging more miles on a treadmill. That’s just a distraction. It made me think I was moving on. But just because you’re moving doesn’t mean you’re processing your feelings and letting go. So do something of substance and self-love. Anything will do. Just make sure you actually do it.

Readers– Any other advice? As always, continue to conversation with me on Twitter and Facebook.

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Beyonce is my patronus, and other hair-whipping, thigh-gyrating thoughts on doing what you love

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Stop reading for moment and look at the above .gif. No, really. Do it. I won’t be offended. Keep looking at it. Isn’t Beyoncé’s windmill just mesmerizing? We should look into her arms as an alternative energy source to power football stadiums when they blackout in the middle of really important games. Now, please get back to reading my post. That’s really what I’m here for. (Oh, okay. One more .gif!)

So yes, in typical Queen B. fashion, Beyoncé rocked the hell out of her half-time performance at the Superbowl last night. There were thigh-high boots, a flaming guitar, and a Destiny’s Child reunion. In case you were passed out in a food coma (This was my family’s table of snacks. Glorious.) or one of the .416 Americans who doesn’t watch football, a replay on her performance can be found here.

All the lights, dancing, and pyrotechnics were amazing, of course, but I can’t get over her confidence and stage presence. From the moment she strutted down that stage to when she sung the last notes of the final song of her set, she owned it up there. Every hair whip. Every hip thrust. Every arm windmill.

After this performance, I declare Beyoncé to be my patronus. She’s unapologetically fierce, amazingly brazen, and let’s face it, has great hair.

Though she’s been dealing with a publicity nightmare of lipsyncing at the inauguration, she didn’t let it show. Expect maybe in her death stare she was giving off sometimes. The stare that tells all of America never to doubt her ever again. Yeah, we get it Beyoncé. We are not worthy.

The thing I found most inspiring about her performance (besides her magical ability to multiply herself by gyrating her thighs as seen in this .gif) is it’s just great to see someone doing what they love and freaking owning it. Yeah, people have been criticizing and making fun of Beyoncé since the live-maybe-not performance at the inauguration, but she still got out there and worked it. Making music and performing are what she loves to do and she’s shamelessly crazy passionate about it.

I really want us all to find something we can “Beyoncé.” Whether it be teaching or something outside academia,  I  really want us all to fall madly in love with something, be unafraid to get out there on that figurative stage, and show everyone why it’s just awesome to do what we do. The world needs more people like that.

Think we can convince Beyonce’s thighs to keep on multiplying?

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The January Recap: brought to you by magical scientists, ridiculous research, and singing bartenders

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Welcome to my first monthly recap! One of my goals is to hold myself more accountable this year in all areas of my life, and making sure I’m staying focused with blogging is a big part of that. I’m hoping to do a round-up  at the end of every month for 2013.

I published two posts on Red Lips & Academics. I was hoping for one more, but it’s currently sitting in WordPress draft purgatory right now. I’m determined to release it to the world and publish it next week.

In an effort of taking the focus off of me and onto helping others, I started with the Four resources to jumpstart your new year for free! I’m pretty personal growth obsessed and had been collecting resources for awhile. And since caring is sharing, I included four of my favorite free ones in this post. Still planning a great 2013? These resources will help you get there.

At the beginning of the year, a lot of life coaches and the like will tell you to pick one word and only one word to define your year. Well, that’s a lot of pressure. I wrote about my experience about finding my word in Finding your Chris Hemsworth of words and declaring it your imperfect year. In addition to figuring out my word for 2013, I also need to find more reasons write about Chris Hemsworth!

I didn’t get another post done on my blog liked I planned, but I did guest post for Krystle of Paperfort Studio. She has this great guest series where writers disclose their fears. Originally  I wanted to choose something really hairy, scary, but I decided to go with something a little smaller. Grasshoppers. Yes, I’m afraid of grasshoppers. For a really big reason, actually. To find out why, check out my guest post here. I’m sure many other freaks and geeks can relate.

And that’s what happened on Red Lips & Academics this month. But I didn’t want to just include my stuff in these recaps. Since I basically read all of the internet everyday, I wanted to share a few other things I found interesting this month.

I’m still fizzy over the new year, and am still busy dreaming and scheming my 2013. In addition to the four (free!) resources to jumpstart your goals that I wrote about, I’ve found two more that I really love from two incredibly inspiring women.

Rosetta Thurman, personal development queen and owner of one of the best smiles ever, has 10 journaling questions to help you envision your ideal life next year. Oh, and they’re good. Another one of my favorites, Jenny Blake, from Life After College has 13 more questions, too. Juicy stuff.

Did you know that a college professor is the easiest job in America? According to Career Cast, it is. I’m sure all academics are with me when my response to this is siiiiigggggggghhhhhhhhhhhh. Teaching is hard, people! Not only do you have to help students learn, you get letters like this. A letter from a student that starts with “I wish to write you about the biggest thing I carry.” Read this, tear up, and give thanks that this student was cared for by a teacher as compassionate as this one.

Must be the sociology minor in me, but I’m really interested in the construction of gender and how it influences our society. I loved reading One Dad’s Ill-Fated Battle Against the Princesses from a father of twin girls who tried to resist letting his daughters feed into the Disney princess culture of tulle dresses, plastic tiaras, and classic, passive femininity. Makes me realize how hard it is to raise a daughter right in our crazy, mixed-up culture. I love the comments too, especially one from another father who wrote about how his daughter plastered her microscope with sparkly stickers and wants to grow up to be a “magical scientist.” Maybe there’s hope for these kids yet.

And to end of a fun note, Hallelujah by Leonard Cohen is probably my favorite song ever. Emotion just slithers from the lyrics and grips you cold. So good. I’m partial to the renditions by Rufus Wainwright and Kate Voegele, but this unknown NYC bartender, Joe Ardizzone, just kills it. Spine, meet tingles. Watch the video of his crazy/amazing performance here.

Finding your Chris Hemsworth of words and declaring it your imperfect year

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I’ve been using Susannah Conway’s Unravelling the Year Ahead workbook, which was mentioned in the last post, to help me define my goals for 2013. She’s all about choosing one word (and only one word. Ah!) to define your entire year. For a wordy bookworm, it’s hard for me to imagine picking just one word. One! What about an adjective too? An adverb? Please?

Susannah used ‘brave’ for last year. I like that. Brave. It’s a strong word. I wanted something similar. Something that invokes passion and power. And awesomeness. Basically, the Thor of words. I would use “fierce,” but my years of obsessively watching America’s Next Top Model marathons have ruined that word for me. So no. No fierce.

But still, I need a Thor of a word to define this incredible year I’m planning. I need the Chris Hemsworth of words, people! Sexy, strong, and preferably Australian.

I got out my trusty notebook to brainstorm, poised my pen, and then that small voice in my head whispered to me. All writers know that pesky, little voice. It’s also known as “the muse” and the reason we do silly, ill advisable things like become writers in the first place. It’s also the reason why non-writers think we’re crazy.

And I agreed with those weird non-writer types (What do you do with your time when you don’t write anyway? Watch TV? Nap? See the sunshine?) when the voice whispered the one word that was supposed to define my year.

Imperfect, she cooed.

Oh, muse, you’re so silly. That word most definitely does not describe Chris Hemsworth. Let’s try sexy or powerful. Or what about ab-tastic? I like the idea of an ab-tastic new year.

Imperfect, she insisted.

No, muse. You must have had too much to drink (A common problem with muses, I think). I would never ever ever want to describe my life that way.

IMPERFECT, she bellowed.

Oh shit.

My muse and I did not speak for the rest of the evening.

The next morning, I woke up wondering where in the hell my muse would have gotten that dirty word. Had she fallen into the wrong crowd? Because this A+, 100% girl hardly ever utters that word. It’s not in my vocabulary, it’s not my style to be imperfect. That would mean I wouldn’t have lived up to my potential. That something had gone wrong. That I would have failed.

In  my ignore-the-muse-with-the-internet-stupor, I surfed mindlessly until I landed on this post by author Neil Gaiman (who I found via the always wonderful Matt Cheuvront). He writes about “the wish” he has for us all this new year.

I hope that in this year to come, you make mistakes.

Because if you are making mistakes, then you are making new things, trying new things, learning, living, pushing yourself, changing yourself, changing your world. You’re doing things you’ve never done before, and more importantly, you’re Doing Something.

Ah, now I get it. Sneaky, little muse. The best ones are, I suppose.

I’ve written before about how my perfectionism often turns into procrastination, but never really realized how bad it was until 365 days of 2012 were behind me with little to show for it. But you know, my commas were in the right place and my budgetting spreadsheets were formatted oh so properly.

This is the year of doing real work. Honest to God, painful, actual work. Work that may not be perfect, but gets something done. Work that means something to someone.

Cause frankly, I have no patience for the semi, pseudo, half work that I’ve been doing. Work that looks pretty (Color coded filing system, how I love thee!), but has no substance. Work that’s left unfinished in hopes for the inspiration of a someday. That’s not me anymore.

Since quitting teaching and leaving academia behind, my main theme has become no longer waiting to start living my life. The rest of my life starts today. I’m no longer telling myself I have to wait until the end of the school year to have the life I want. I wish all academics the same. Even with the classes, the students, and the grading, we deserve a life of our own.

For 2013, I hope you find your Chris Hemsworth of a word. Even if it’s not as sexy, powerful, or Australian as you would like. I hope it’s a word that challenges you to do more, have more, and be more than 2012. And I hope that word inspires you to do real, actual, awe-inspiring, soul-shaking work.

Here’s to 2013! Here’s to Doing Something! The something that warrants capital letters, mind you.

{Readers–What’s your Chris Hemsworth of a word to define 2013? You can choose fierce if you want. I won’t judge!}

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Four resources to jumpstart your new year. For free!

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Four Resources to Jumpstart Your New Year For Free!

Are you one of those people who hates New Year’s resolutions? Yeah, me too. I usually scoff at those overly-optimistic people who make a whole list of goals we all know are going to be forgotten by February. That was until, I made a big, bad goal of learning to take care of myself. And suddenly, making resolutions didn’t seem so bad. Declaring what you want and putting it out there? I can dig it.

Now, I just have to figure out how to make all my resolutions come true. The hardest part, right? I’ve found some resources I liked, and thought you guys and gals could benefit too. Here’s a few guides I’ve been using to dream and scheme for the new year. And guess what? They’re fo’ free!

Amanda Genther’s 2013 Playbook

For all you business bad-asses out there, this one is for you. Brand developer Amanda Genther shows us how real work gets done in 2013. Using a launch calendar, monthly breakdowns, and master tasks list, Amanda helps you plan your entire year of your business. It seems so simple, I’m wondering why I haven’t been doing this all along. Usually making detailed plans is time-consuming and scary, but Amanda succeeds in breaking it down into more manageable steps. To learn more about her, visit her website here.

Nicole Antoinette’s Why Wait? A Bullshit free guide on jumpstarting your goals for the new year

Nicole Antoinette kills it in her goal-setting guide, Why Wait? A bullshit-free guide to jump-starting your goals for the new year. She takes regular ol’ goal advice and kicks its ass. So don’t expect platitudes on how to become a sparkly time-management unicorn. Nope, Nicole is real, honest, and focused on helping people cutting out the bullshit from their lives to do what they actually want. With imaginative exercises (The Eff Yeah List was my favorite) and a dose of humor, it’s dozens of pages of good, good inspiration. I’ll be working with Nicole one-on-one for the first six months of the year, and I can’t wait to tell you about it. You can download her ebook for free here.

Betty Means Business’s Kill Overwhelm and Make Shit Happen

I love the message behind Kate Bryne’s Betty Means Business website. Empowering creative female entrepreneurs? Yes, please. But I feel like everyone, female or not, entrepreneurial or not, can learn from Bryne, who has a Ph.D in Communication and co-founded a successful business. In Kill Overwhelm and Make Shit Happen, she lays out the basics of productivity peppered with good advice and exercises. And the great thing is her advice can be put into practice right now. Like, sitting at your computer staring at the screen kinda right now. Sign up for her email list here to receive the ebook.

Susannah Conway’s Unravelling the Year Ahead

Not only is this planning guide gorgeous and functional, it’s full of juicy questions and planning exercises to bring closure to 2012 and explore what you want in 2013. Not sure how you felt about 2012? Oh, Susannah will get it out of you using creative questions and doodling. Yes, doodling. Also unsure about your future in 2013? You’ll have a pretty good idea after finishing several pages of dreaming, sketching, and brainstorming. You can download a free copy here.

{Readers–I’ve recently become obsessed with goal setting. Do you know any resources that would help me or others?}

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